The Now

Too many people in this world give up on happiness because they are stuck in a place that doesn’t exist. They’re either submerged in grief, sadness, guilt and an endless stream of what-ifs or they are smothered by fear, doubt, and worry; their vision blocked by a never ending brick wall of impossibility. We have all lived in these imaginary worlds at some point or another. They are known commonly as the past and the future, and most people spend so much of their time in these places that they miss the only thing that is ever real; the present moment.
Think of the last time you felt depressed. When you felt like nothing you did mattered and there was no point in taking another breath, getting out of bed, or pushing through another day. That might even be now at this very moment. Take a second and view your thoughts, observe them and see what world they are in. Are they here, now? I am almost positive that they are in an imaginary world that your brain has created.

     Are you torn apart by the memory of someone you have lost? Do you have thoughts scrutinizing over a missed opportunity? Tormenting you over making a mistake, telling you that you should have known better and that everything would be great had you just not been so damn stupid? These thoughts were created in the imaginary world known as the past. You may say, “But these things happened, they were real and they directly impacted my life!” and yes, at one point they were real, but now they are as real as a match that has burned away. Focusing on them and trying to change them are as realistic as hoping for that match to re-materialize.

Are you constantly worrying about how you will pay that next bill? What will happen to you or your family if you lose your job? Dreaming of endless possibilities that you tell yourself will never happen for you? Doubting your ability to fulfill your dreams and achieve true happiness? Telling yourself that you will be happy once you obtain a certain status or afford a certain lifestyle? These thoughts are created in the imaginary world known as the future. They do not exist and only serve to take away the one true thing that exists, this present moment, the here, the now.

When you spend the present agonizing over the past or in fear of the future, you transport yourself away from reality and choose to live in worlds that will only increase your suffering.
You can’t change the past, no matter how hard you try you will not be able to make the better decision you wish you had, you will not be able to take the path you didn’t chose, you will never be able to be with the one you lost. Focusing on this inability will leave you feeling hopeless. You must remember that experience only comes right after you need it, and that we make mistakes so that we may learn and grow. If you hadn’t made that mistake in the past, you would have never learned. Accept that you cannot change the past, embrace the newfound knowledge you have, and stop letting the past pull you back from achieving the happiness that is available right now.

The future is being decided every moment. Some imagine the future as a scary unknown that can bring loss, sadness, old age and death. They spend their present moment in fear over things that don’t even exist! They lose their ability to be happy because they chose to live in an imaginary world of scary possibilities. Some people call themselves optimistic because they believe the future contains their path to happiness. They imagine that once they have that dream job, once they find their soulmate, once they make a million dollars, then, and only then will they finally be happy. They spend their present moment in this fairy tale, focusing on desire and want. The sad reality is that when you live in the imaginary future, that want is never filled. You will never be happy because you will always place yourself further in the future, in a place where you will have even more money, an even bigger house, an even higher status!

   Think about this moment right now; look around and think about the endless things you have to be happy about right now. You are alive, you can take your next breath, you can read or hear these words being read, you can perceive and feel and exist in a world of amazing and endless wonder! There might be many negative things going on in your life, but it is up to you to decide if it will make you suffer in this moment. Will you let the misfortune of your past hold you back, the fear or desires of the future to deny this moment? In every present moment there lies the possibility for happiness, but that choice is left up to you!

      Happiness does not just happen, it is not dependent on a perfect, spotless past or some insurmountable, desire laden future. It is a choice that you make when you decide how to spend every moment. To be happy you must be present; to be happy you have to be here now. Stop living in these imaginary worlds. Stop living in constant grief, fear or want! Focus on this moment and its endless possibilities, smile, take a deep breath and choose to be happy. It is always possible and don’t let those living in their  imaginary worlds tell you otherwise.